Over at Enlightenment Reactionary a

Over at Enlightenment Reactionary a suggestion is made to go ahead and implement some of the Democratic Party's solutions to everyday situations. Here are a few of my favorite:

• Effective immediately all Caucasians and successful minorities will be required to practice the "open garage" policy. Garage doors must be left open at all times. The inner door must be unlocked as well. After all, trespassers just want a cold beer and to watch some TV, just like everybody else.
• Universities will immediately desist from the discriminatory practice of limiting the number of students that can register for a given class and thus oppressing the punctuality-challenged. All interested students must be allowed to enroll. In an unrelated matter universities will be fined $10,000 per student per semester for each instance of insufficient seating.
• To prevent the undue hardship of a disconnection, delinquint utility bills will be paid by the neighbors living on either side of the financially distressed person.
• The concept of the checkout counter "Leave a penny, take a penny" dish has proven so popular that the legislature has passed a bill applying the principle to the pockets of people standing next to you in line. Despite the name, the law permits any denomination to be taken. Participation is compulsory.
• In order to put a stop to the scourge of racial profiling, identification cards will no longer be required to cash a check, buy cigarettes or alcohol, buy guns or ammunition, attend adult movies, sign a contract, or pick up children from any day care.

Read the whole thing here, and while you're at the site go check out his Leftist Lexicon. Posted by Jody at May 2, 2005 07:23 PM | TrackBack